FREEDOM!!!!!!!!!

I wake up sometimes and all I wanna do is run around naked, with my hair scattered, screaming at the top of my lungs " I AM FREEEEEE"!!!!.

But I can't because in reality, I am not. and the sad thing is the chains that so intricately bind me are woven so deep in the fabric of my life. Certainly, I cannot do the above because I would walk around with a huge chain on my neck bearing the inscription "CERTIFIED INSANE PERSON; A THREAT TO SOCIETY AND SELF."

Mine is a confused state of bondage because I have been given the blessing or curse, (however you wanna look at it), called "FREEWILL". It seems rather contradictory, really, when you look at it, I am free, I am not in prison neither am I a slave; I do not have to answer to certain things and i do not have to succumb to ideals if I have no care for them. However, those are not the ties that bind; I am talking about those inanimate things that more or less, dictate to us, how we should live our lives. and oh yes, you are part of us...

Lets take a look shall we? 

You wake up in the morning, say around 5:30 a.m, because you've got work to go to; you could easily stay at home and not work, you might add, but then you will lose your job and you can't afford to lose your job because that very job helps pay the bills.

Talking bout the bills, the rent is unpaid, electricity has been cut off, water is a no-show, estate management fee, plumbing needs to be fixed, gas needs to be refilled, phone needs to be recharged... should I go on?

Next, you decide to go to work, not anticipating the annoying people you will definitely see; those who have made it their life's duty to cause you pain and make your life an eternal hell. Somehow, you manage to take all that in and the next set of challenges brushes you off your feet, you've gotta face family issues, friendship issues, relationship issues and of course, the draining exercise of battling with your conscience...

To do or not to do?, Should I or should I not?, Is this good? No way, its bad, but it's not really bad, Can I do it? What will be the outcome if i do? But I'm not going all the way so it can't be that bad... And you go ahead and do it anyways. Next thing is you find yourself in a church and the preacher is preaching on salvation and the very topic you just finished acting out in real life. You immediately get a mental picture of yourself in flames and the monster in red with a pitchfork, opening his mouth and breathing fire, and you cower and break out in cold sweat.....

You eventually go home at the end of the day, tired and bent outta shape and you recap all the events of the day, heave a heavy sigh and fall asleep only to wake up the next day and continue with the same routine.... sometimes, lesser issues and other days mega- issues.

All in all, it is plain to see that this thing called "Freewill" is the slave master and we are the slaves and that is the fate we have all been resigned to. *sigh*

Marie.

MY KISS

MY KISS MEANS A LOT OF THINGS:

IT MEANS I LOVE YOU;

IT MEANS I CARE ABOUT YOU;

IT MEANS YOU MAKE ME HAPPY;

IT MEANS YOU ARE MY WORLD;

MY KISS CAN ALSO MEAN:

I ADORE YOU;

YOU'RE MY FRIEND;

I MISS YOU;

I'M GLAD TO HAVE YOU IN MY LIFE;

SOMETIMES IT MAY MEAN:

I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY TO YOU;

I'M UNHAPPY;

I JUST WANNA HOLD YOU;

I'M SCARED;

OTHER TIMES, MY KISS MEANS:

THERE IS NOTHING ELSE I CAN DO;

I'M SORRY IT HAS TO BE THIS WAY;

I WON'T WAIT FOR YOU FOREVER.

UNLIKE OTHERS, MY KISS IS MORE THAN A MERE MEETING OF TWO SETS OF LIPS;

IT IS NOT JUST ANOTHER FORM OF ENDEARMENT;

WITH EACH KISS, A MESSAGE IS PASSED. THINGS I CANNOT FIND THE WORDS TO SAY ARE INTIMATED IN MY KISS.

MY KISS IS VERY DEEP AND MEANINGFUL, FILLED WITH SWEET NECTAR OF THE FLOWERS AND BRIMMING WITH THE DELICACIES OF THE GODS...

MY KISS IS A MIRROR OF MY HEART; 

IT SAYS WHATEVER MY HEART TELLS IT TO SAY;

FRIENDSHIPS HAVE BEEN MADE BY A KISS, LOVER'S HAVE BEEN DENIED BY THAT SAME KISS...

BUT ONE THING MY KISS WON'T DO, 

IS TO BETRAY A HEART THAT'S TRUE..

nature!!!!!

Most times when I look out at night, my gaze wonders far into the skyline;

I begin to appreciate the beauty that comes before my eyes.

True beauty for me, does not lie in the things we make, but rather in the things that we do not make.

Someone once told me that all things were created beautiful and I the time, I didn't agree.

Permit me to say now that, I think he was right. Indeed all things were made beautiful; it just depends on who's looking and the manner in which you gaze. 

I once took a stroll with a friend one night and he pointed out something to me; from our vantage point, the moon stood right in the middle of two palm trees and I thought to myself, "that has to be the most beautiful sight ever". As I grow older each day, I find that I have come to appreciate every little thing that comes my way. 

Taking a stroll each night intensifies my desire to find the essence of beauty and I have come to the conclusion that the best exemplifier of this is Nature. Have you ever wondered why the clouds are formed the way they are? Every angle forms something different; the moonlight sending soft shadows across the sky and the stars , adding detail to the impression.

I watched a movie and I learnt that no matter how big the moon might seem, because of the distance, it is the same size of your thumb. yes, I tried it out and it is true... All you have to do is close one eye and raise your thumb in the direction of the moon... I love to feel the soft breeze blowing and tingling my senses, the smell of the rain before it comes, the heat of the sun across my face, the wash of the waves on my feet... everything so pure, so ethereal...so surreal.

Nature has this calming effect on the soul, it gently takes over your senses and gives you clarity.

All the elements of nature coming together to form a great, encompassing caress that gently nudges you to that place where dreams come alive and reality seems to vanish...

ALTER EGO

I am not a fetish person, neither do I believe in the fates or mysterious signs or reading the clouds and all of that. I think it is overrated. However, I read them because I find them... interesting, to say the least.
Everyone has a part they cover up, the part that shows who they really are, when they are not under the scrutiny of the society and they have uncovered themselves from the facade they present to the outside world. This other persona has been called all sorts of names; most of which are unfair, if I may say.

We live in a world where we have been taught to hide our animalistic tendencies; with good reason too, as we cannot be running on pure emotions and passions. So we have this thing, this umbrella that has set out for us, that which is considered "appropriate" and "acceptable". As a result of this, we are presented with an "ideal" way of living, everything is peaceful and everything is "normal", there seems to be no confusion as everything is laid out in black and white.

The problem lies when a situation presents itself and those uncultured feelings that have been suppressed all along decide to surface and when they do, we find it embarrassing, sometimes uncivilized and in extreme cases, horrible and revolting. I see the reason why we are told to put a leash on these things and I agree with them to an extent; but my question is: Who set this rules and regulations that we live by? a lot of things are under the term "society", Who or What is this "Society", are they humans? are they gods? do they have special powers? are they themselves normal? What is even "Normal"? the questions are many...

And thats where the English and semantics come in, you hear some terms like "relative", "personal", some say its "intuitive", others shrug and say" who cares"?. It is easy to say "who cares", but it stops becoming funny when you hear of murderers and rapists, thieves and sex offenders, raving lunatics and those that are termed"evil".

So we all have this other person, the one that we are ashamed of showing in public, the one we have hidden, the one whose voice plays inside our heads, the one we struggle with everyday.. We have this one who is crying out, the one who tells us to do things that we consider wrong, the one whom we try to shut out...
I fall under the zodiac sign known as Gemini, we represent duality, two extremes... sometimes when I read about these things, I marvel because of the striking similarities I see in my own person. This duality, I believe is manifest in our personalities.

I have been taught to be polite, to be courteous, to say words like "excuse me", "I'm sorry", "pardon me", "thank you" when I really want to say words like "go to hell", "who cares"?, and other words which I will not write here. I have learnt to smile when I really want to yell my head off, I have learnt not to pick my nose, not to talk  at the dinner table... I have been conditioned to be "ladylike" in my dealings, to sit with my legs closed and to do things that "real ladies"do. Sometimes, I hate it and other times, I accept it.

Then there are those times, when I shrug off the burden of all that and enjoy the very presence of me..., I unleash and do the things that I have always wanted to do and I feel... free. There is this rush of orgasmic pleasure that unveils itself and ecstasy is released... So what does that make me, the fact that I'm doing these things which are frowned upon? What is worse, that I am doing them or I  actually ENJOYING doing them?

I am no psychologist and I have no paper that proves I have made a world-changing theory, but I think if we all can just maintain a balance between these two personalities, it will be OK... How long do you wanna suppress the fact that you are a shoplifter when your public image is that of a shrewd business man, or the fact that you are sleeping with your neighbor's son when you are the upstanding governor's wife. Am I condoning it?, No, Am I in support? No, I am just saying that you get to know yourself and the things you can handle. You can lie to everyone but you cannot lie to yourself; and if for any reason you feel you cannot let it loose, then by all means don't. All I ask is do not be judgmental when you see other people indulging because given the chance, you will do the exact same thing in varying degrees, the only difference will be whether you are caught or not...

THIS....... THING.........

I'm here, the start of a new day...
Rolling off my bed this morning, I had no inkling of what the day would hold,
If I were to judge from the night before, I would say my day would probably be really good and filled with lots of fun,
After all, me and my girlfriends are going to the movies.
However, I should have known that something would happen which would eventually turn my day around.
For one, I decided to choose an all black attire; it never occurred to me at the time but black was exactly how my mood stayed through out the day..
I showered, and though I decided to put some make up on, it still didn't cover up for the fact that my face had some serious bags..
Stepping out in to the dreadful cold, I begin to walk down to my estate gate, shivering as I walk... it has never been this cold.
I get to the office, start my day, and everything begins to go downhill...
First, I am hustled by an overbearing boss, my tummy beings to get upset and I am hit with this wave of nausea that it takes everything I've got not to run to the bathroom.
Still, I maintain my jovial nature, the boss is a perpetual pain so its nothing new.
I am still feeling very nauseated and the hunger comes, not a very good combination.

In a space of five minutes, everything changes; I am overwhelmed with this mood I call "B.L.A.C.K".
Nothing seems to work, I have got a serious frown on my face, I give in to the slightest confrontation...
Black is not just a state of mind, it is an overpowering element that controls.
I have learnt with time to contain it and most times, I succeed but there are some days when it is at its peak.
Days like today and it comes with so much negativity that the whole atmosphere is charged with pessimism and unconstructiveness.

And I try, I try my hardest to fight this feeling that has engulfed me; but I can't..
I begin to think of the things that make me happy; I begin to make frantic calls to people that can make me smile.
All to no avail... I become frustrated; I listen to my music which is a sure way of making me feel better but I toss my ear piece aside and the anger grows...
 Food... Aha!!! That should do it but surprisingly, I do not have appetite, my taste buds are down and the bitterness is feeding on my insides...
This has to be the worst B.L.A.C.K mood, a situation where none of the things that gladden me works.
It is the mother of all Blackness.

So here I am, a last desperate attempt to shake of this feeling;
I turn to writing and hopefully, by the end of this piece, I will feel the blackness softly seeping out.


I have reached the last paragraph of this piece and still, no effect...

THE END OF A BEGINNING

It began, just like every other one,
Two lost souls searching for one another;
The moment they meet, something explodes and they unite,
Two different people, from two different parts of the world, with nothing in common, deciding to meet to start something.
It begins, the fairytale romance, the stolen kisses and the whispered promises,
It begins and blossoms...
But this one was different...
Oh yes, it started out in an amazing way,
But I was taken to the future and caught a glimpse of it a few months down the line;
And what I saw.......
I saw no reason to continue, I saw no reason for us to keep hurting each other;
A few months down the line; I saw the ultimate betrayal.

But how do you tell someone that you yearn for, someone who has genuine feelings, someone who has woven some intricate threads of desire and need;
How do you tell that person that you have have refused to go on?
How do you tell them that its a futile journey?
How do you tell that one that it is not going to work out before it has even started.

So this one begins... it begins full of hope, full of promise and full of pain...
It begins and each day brings it closer to the end.
It is indeed frustrating, this abortion of hopes and happiness..
But no matter how hard one tries, no matter how much one puts in effort, no matter how much devotion and love is pumped in to it...
This one is predestined to fall to pieces, it has been predetermined to fail, the fates have prophesied doom...
And poof... the dream is gone.

THE REASON I WRITE...

Writing to me is not a function of artistic talent,
Though I must agree that there has to be some form of artistry in a piece...
I do not write to be noticed as someone with skill,
I do not write because I want people to label me a "writer";
I do not write because I think that I have something very important to share...
I do not even write because I want to be recognized or be acclaimed;
I am no poet, I am no artist, neither am I a writer.
I am just someone who has a lot inside and needs to find a release outside.
I am someone who is affected by moods and when the different moods come,
they press down on me so hard that I find solace in letting everything out.
I found my solace, I found my place of quiet and rest, I found my place of purity,
The English Language has termed the action "writing" and those who do this are called "writers".

So I am a writer.... and as a result, I write;
but what do I write? what are my motives for writing? are there any set boundaries for writing?
Of course there are;
However, I see writing in a different light. Writing is passionate, Writing speaks,
Writing screams, Writing yells, Writing whispers, Writing, sings, Writing dances, Writing breathes, Writing does a lot of other things.
To me, Writing is life, Writing has a soul, Writing feels pain, joy, sadness... you name it.
Writing is alive...
Writing is all these things and more because it employs two immutable and powerful elements:
The Power of Imagination and The Power of Words.

When you delve into the World of Writing, you become unlimited;
Everything is before you, a vast space of ideas and concepts and memories, both created and those yet unknown;
Writing gives you power, power to create, power to erase, power to build, power to delegate, power to choose... there are no limitations whatsoever.

So I write... I write what I feel, I write what I know, I write the impossible, I write through my senses, I write through another's point of view, I write.....
I write because whatever comes out is a piece of me, I write because its a means of escape sometimes, I write because I feel this certain strong compulsion, I write because I can create a world of my own and fill it with the beautiful things I want..
I write because in this world, there are no clouds of judgement, no moral bane of society to uphold...
I write because it flows from deep inside of me, its something that I cannot deny..
I may not have the rhyming words, or a rehearsed speech or a dictated opinion...

All I know is that whenever I get my hands to a keyboard or a pen to a paper, or any surface...
Something flows and it doesn't stop flowing till I have emptied every last word.
I may not be happy afterwards, or the tears may still flow or the hunger still burning fierce..
But there's one constant thing....
SATISFACTION!!!
And in the end, that is all there is...

I write because... it is the best way I know how to express.

25 RANDOM THINGS ABOUT ME...... WAY BACK WHEN...

1... I have an acute fear of failure that's why I try as much as possible to pursue goals very aggressively.


2... I love my family. my mum is literally my reason for breathin, my sis- cldnt have asked for a better blend, my bro-very crazy but I love you sha n Mr. Mensah- what can I say?

3... Sometimes I feel I'm schizophrenic. Scary right? i hold conversations with myself.

4... I have bin in TEN relationships but only two have bin serious i.e 4 years ago n presently, have had a thousand n one flings n sex????????????? don't bother.


5... I have fallen in love just ONCE n I think I'm on my way there again.

6... Despite my degree in English,Ii find it hard talking bout my feelings. The words won't come out no matter how hard I try.

7... Underneath all the facade, I'm still a baby. I cry at the slightest things so don't make me cry.


8... There are just two sets of people in my life- those that matter and those that don't. Find where you fall .

9...I'm a person of extremes, extremely nice one minute and extremely callous the next. There's no mid-point with me

10... I give people long ropes to hang themselves then I react and when I do.... so don't think I'm a fool, I'm just giving you time to hang yourself

11... We've all done things we're not proud of but the difference between me and you? I don't run away, I face them because they make me who I am

12... People say I'm complicated and unpredictable, I say I'm normal because there are two sides to a person, while you are busy hiding yours, I let mine show. Eliminates rude shocks that way

13... I can do anything for my friends. You are the bomb!!!!!!!!!

14... I'm really good at giving advice but do I take my own advice? Go figure!!!!!!!

15... I am confident, HELL YES, but most times I'm all jelly inside

16... Once I've made up my mind to do something, consider it done.

17... I loooooove dancing; have amazing energy, addicted to my music and ea rpiece.

18... My phone rings EVERYDAY. I don't think I've ever heard my phone NOT ring. So I'm obsessed SUE ME.

19... I smile a lot but I've got problems of my own. REALLY

20... Two things I don't joke with- MY FOOD AND MY SLEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

21...I can be crazy, like really, really, crazy. It'll break my mum's heart to hear some of the things I've done.

22... I'm a very passionate person, you should have me on your team#

23... I rarely get angry but when I do...MAJOR EXPLOSION!!!!!!!! little things get to me... then I cry afterwards.

24... I'm not perfect, Yes I do wrong; No I ain't good enough but HE still loves me.I'M A SUCKER for GOD.

25... I'm a citizen of the world. My great grand dad was a Brazilian, me great mum was from Cotonou, me Grandma married a Ghanaian and me Dad went to Delta to get hitched. Once again GO FIGURE!!!!!!!






So this was me spilling out my guts for the whole world to see. As with time, some things have changed, some things are the same and some things.... well, they are better left unsaid.






Marie.

THANK YOU FOR SAYING NO!!!

The very day you said "NO" to me; I felt as if the whole world had turned its back on me;

The very day you said "NO" to me; you rejected me;

The very day you said "NO" to me"; I wept my eyeballs out;

The very day you said "NO" to me; it was a direct slap on my face;

The very day you said "NO" to me; you insulted my person;

And the very day you said "no" to me; you gave me a blessing.

                                Because...

The very day you said "NO" to me; I saw myself in a different light;

The very day you said "NO" to me; I found solace in my own strength;

The very day you said "NO" to me; I embraced my self worth;

The very day you said "NO" to me; you opened up the door for others to come in and appreciate me;

The very day you said "NO" to me; I learned to love myself more;

And the very day you said "NO" to me; I found a greater purpose in life.

So Thank You For Saying "NO" To Me.

MY DREAM: A FAIRYTALE ROMANCE.

Every night when I'm on my bed, I close my eyes and think about what to dream of.
Its my nightly tonic and it works like a charm.
Most nights, it is the same dream: my perfect romance.
I always have a hard time deciding how I will meet him, the one who takes over my dreams and captures my reality.
Some things are certain though, he is handsome, rich, nice and sweeps me entirely off my feet.
Last night, he came again in my dreams;
This time I meet him at the salon...

We are all making our hair, I and some other ladies in the salon;
As usual, there is this general discussion going on and everyone is putting their opinions out there.
There's this young lady who just got engaged and we are all ogling  at her ring and telling her how lucky she is to have a man who is ready to make that huge commitment and all when he walks in...

He is clad in a tee shirt and jeans and he looks unbelievably handsome... and lost.
I do not know what exactly it is about him. Could be his presence, the very air around him;
Could be his beautiful, well toned body, could be the fact that when he smiles, his cheeks dimple or his deep voice, articulating every word spoken.

He is built like a Greek god, a modern day Adonis but he doesn't come looking for me.
He's looking for the young lady that just got engaged, he's probably her fiancé.
He kisses her cheek and she smiles up at him lovingly, oh yes, he's taken alright.
Then I wonder, how can the star of my own dream be someone else's hero?

He leaves and we all pounce on her expecting answers to our numerous questions, each female secretly admiring. Or is it envy? a little of both.
Then she bursts out laughing and says he's not her fiancé, he's her brother.
(My dream is back on track and running on rails).

Fast forward to the middle scene where the romance is blossoming at an alarming rate;
He knows just what to do, when I'm with him, I am all there is.
I do not share my man with any one, he has time for me, he is created specially to cater to me;
Showers me with love, affection and devotion. I love him for the little things he does that lift my spirit.
I love him and he is the center of my world, matter of fact, he is my world, wrapped, packaged and delivered to me.

When we are together, I am complete, I find true happiness in his arms and his words are golden to me,
He upholds me with love, surrounds me with care, he envelopes me with his warmth and he protects me like a shield and in his embrace, I feel his need radiate.

He is my man, my lover, my brother,  my soul mate,
He is the very definition of pure masculinity,
He completes me and adores me,
Most of all, he is the love of my life, he is the one that takes me in my stupidity, he pardons my irrationality,
He is thankful for my love and devotion and he appreciates my care and affection.
He is egotistical and proud but he never fails to apologize when he's hurt me,
He is sweet and sophisticated, he knows my every move and action,
He accepts me for who I am and does not play on my weakness.
Hell, he is my weakness, he is the core of my being.

He is so imperfect and so full of blemish,
Yet he is mine, all mine...
He is my dream in bodily form...
And he has eyes for only me and me alone.

ITS COMPLICATED

So here I am thinking this young lady I once knew;
So very beautiful, so very patient and so very nice;
If you had asked her to describe herself I'm certain she wouldn't use those words.

She was friendly as well, to a fault, some might even add;
Always had a smile on her face and her small shoulders were always ready to bear someone's head.
She could listen also; whenever you had troubles, she would listen and she always knew the right words to say to calm you down.

I saw her at a distance, coming down the lane; strolling with her hair in the wind and her eardrums blocked with a set of earphones.
As she walked, she unconsciously moved to the rhythm that was invisible to everyone else.
She smiles and waves to a passer by across the street; it seems she's popular.

Now, I am not a stalker but she fascinates me and I begin to wait for her everyday;
I watch her as she comes, sometimes in a cab, sometimes, someone drops her off, and sometimes, she strolls.
On this particular day, she walks down the street, wearing blue; but there's something in her smile that is not true.
She is sad, I can feel it. Yes, she gives a smile to people passing and stops to hug and greet them; she even manages to listen to someone's problems and yet, no one even notices that she is troubled. No one apart from me.

She stops and sits on a bench in the park; listening to her music and lost in her own world;
I approach just in time to see hear wipe a lonely tear drop and that little action compels me to action and I walk up to her.
I ask her if she would like to open up to a total stranger, a stranger she's never going to see again, I do not ask her for her name and she doesn't ask for mine.
She looks up at me and smiles, a beautiful smile that lights up her whole face and at the same time, illuminates me. Little wonder she is liked by all.
She speaks to me, not at me or through me but TO me;
She tells me she's lonely and hurting, she is craving something that no one has been able to give her.

And she's tired of trying, tired of hoping, tired of seeing potential in dead things;
She wants to be happy, she wants to talk and someone will listen, she wants to cry and know that there is someone who will wipe her tears; she wants to be loved.
She has so much to give but she can't find the person to give it to.

She's scared and scarred. She's been hurt, she's been depressed and she has this yearning, this insatiable hunger for someone who sees her as she really is: a woman with so much to share.
She talks and I listen and I am drawn to her.
She listens to music because that is the only thing that gives her comfort, no matter how flitting.
She craves something deep and lasting so she engages in giving a part of herself out hoping that someday, someone would give back to her.

She thanks me for listening and smiles at me, she still doesn't ask for my name and I do not ask for hers.
All she asks me is if I would be here, at this very same spot tomorrow,
And for me, she has just asked the most important question in the world.
I will definitely be there waiting for her, tomorrow and any other day she needs me.
She pats my hand and she's gone, leaving me with the delicate trail of her musky scent.

For once in my life, I feel fulfilled.
I feel I have given her something she will not forget.
I let her set the pace and I will follow, where ever she may lead.

CURTAIN CALL 2

My name is Tamar; I was born a beautiful, screaming, little bundle;
My name is Tamar, I was born full of hope and promises yet unfulfilled;
My name is Tamar; I was born into a loving family filled with warmth and brightness;
My name is Tamar; I was born into comfort, affluence and wealth;
My name is Tamar... and I was born... with purpose.

I would really have loved to tell you about the moments after I was born; the next days, the next weeks, the next months or the next years, but I cannot because I simply have no clue whatsoever. I would have to be some type of paranormal child to be able to do that; you know, like something out of the "X-FILES".

I remember growing up lacking nothing, I was given anything and everything I wanted.
I remember being called beautiful and cute,
I remember being called intelligent and smart and full of promise;
and I also remember being called proud, spoilt and eventually, snobbish.
The above is all very true, I might add. The thing is, at some point I had to stop listening to and bearing the names other people had called me. I decided to start giving myself some names as well.

Top of that list were: nice, good looking, deep, thoughtful and most of all, mature.
It is a major SIN to think that maturity comes only with age; I learnt this as I learnt so many other things;
The most consistent word that follows maturity is RESPONSIBILITY, and most of the time, that is accompanied by PAIN.

Most of the time, we want to believe that our lives are controlled by other people when the actual truth is the control comes in phases: the first and probably the strongest phase is the "Parental Control Phase".
"Peer Control Phase", "Societal Control Phase", and the list is endless. However, the three most important phases to me are: the "Parental Control Phase", the "You Phase" and the "God Control Phase".

There comes a time when we have got to brace up and let go of the chords that bind; because overtime, they become shackles. Where we fall short is not being able to decipher when to let go and move on and as a result, we find ourselves heavy with unnecessary baggage.

Is this the story of what happened to me? no, its not. I just felt like sharing what I've learnt over the course of time.

Anyways, I've exhausted my quota of wisdom for the day, I need to go back and replenish.

*wink* Marie.

MUCH ADO BOUT NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS.

So its the year Two Thousand and Eleven.... such a mouthful.
2011, its the start of the new year; looking back at last year, I can say for certain that some wonderful things happened to me.
For one, I found a way to channel all my creative pieces and this blog was birthed; I moved into my own place( which really deserved the celebration), I lost a boyfriend (really, really hurt), I found a partner.... got a job.....
Yeah. last year was pretty eventful

So... Happy New Year to you all.

 It is the new year and of course, we've got sooo many people "claiming" to stick to some "new set of rules to live by" which I think is so cliche, by the way.
I'm of the opinion that people who do not keep to what they purpose to do are not worth....
Harsh words right? I fall in to that category but I differ from them for the simple reason that I don't propose things that I know I cannot handle.
No, I'm not saying you should not challenge yourself or push yourself or anything of the sort; NO.
I am saying, of what use is a resolution when it is not acted upon? the fact that I have decided to do something, or the fact that I have made up my mind to stop doing some things doesn't mean that I have done them... no?
My point of view though.

In truth, the fact that I wanna quit smoking( I do not smoke, by the way), or I wanna be more focused or I wanna be more money conscious or more God conscious doesn't mean that I am gonna do it anyways.

I think the correct thing should be: I RESOLVE to do..... and at the end of the year or the particular time frame alloted, I DID.

A resolution is not a resolution simply because I made up my mind to do it, it becomes complete when I actually DO it.

A word: let us stop making new "resolutions" year after year and concentrate on getting them done; thereby giving room for more. Our strength does not lie in simply making up our minds, our strength or weakness, as the case maybe, lies in our ability to carry them through.

lets get moving people..... its a New Year.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS.

The holidays are over; We all get to go back to our various duty posts.
Sure we all had fun and everything; some people like me had truck loads of it;
but now...... we all get to go back to face computer screens and and the different gadgets we own.

First off, let me tender my apologies for neglecting you all, during that time;
I guess I was caught in the excitement of seeing my family and friends,
Rekindling old flames *wink..wink* and just being absolutely naughty.

I got home and only the smell of the hot, humid air in Lagos, brought a full smile to my face.
I saw the traffic from the airport and nodded to myself; I was indeed back, for the next two weeks, this was gonna be my home.
No more of the quiet, peaceful life that Abuja gives; it was raw, pulsating energy here which i had missed... a great deal.

There were times when I found myself missing the peace and tranquility of my second home in Abuja; times when we had to sleep without electricity which was like almost every night and the water.... I cant remember the last time I had to ACTUALLY take a bucket and ACTUALLY fetch water; the hot, searing weather.......

That was the worst of it though; I had pure, undiluted fun. It was like..... a part of me had just risen and I was reveling in that life. Like I said before, the holidays are times when you let yourself go, just enjoy the freedom of the moment, and do whatever you feel like doing. These days do not come as often as we would like but when they do come, they should be met without the eccentricities of our baggage that we each carry about.

We should sit back, relax with our feet up, drinking glasses of champagne or lemonade or vodka and coke or whatever you want.....

It is the holidays, enjoy 'em while they last.

As for me, I'm back to the sanity and the hustle and bustle of the corporate world. Back to constant electricity... constant water supply..... and of course....... the beautiful yet chilling cold.

Marie.